Son...

My son hasn't spoken to me in over a year. Yesterday was his 29th birthday and I sent him an e-mail wishing him a happy birthday and there was no reply. I try to tell myself it does not hurt but the fact of the matter is it does. 

I have thought about writing him a longer e-mail but I am afraid I will just get snubbed once again. You might be wondering why he does not want anything to do with me. It basically boils down to the fact that I moved to Texas and he did not agree with that decision. He went so far as to tell me the last time I spoke to him that I was crazy. 

He freely admits that he would never allow anyone to tell him how to live, or where to live for that matter. Yet feels he has the right to tell me and thinks I am crazy because I don't obey him. Now there is some seriously flawed logic for you there. He judges my life, and my friends though he has never met any of them, and has no clue how I live my life here. 

He has two young daughters and I really wonder if when they are his age if he will allow them to dictate to him the way he tries to do to me? I seriously doubt it.I am still very torn if I should try again to communicate with him, or to let it be. 

One Of These Days..,

I will learn to keep my big mouth shut. I have two really close friends and we normally get a long really well together. Well at least until a few months ago. Now you have to understand we are all big girls and we do tease each other a lot. Normally it is not a problem and helps us to deal with our abundance of physical self. 

Well for some odd reason (I still haven't exactly determined why though I have theories) Friend S started being really nasty mean to friend D. She got so bad that for awhile me and friend D started avoiding her. Well then things sort of came to a head because friend D was really getting fed up ( I don't blame her a bit). So friend S e-mails me one day and ask me if I thought she was being a bully too friend D. So me in one of my dumber moments (plus the desire to stick up for friend D) I told her that yes she was. I gave her examples of why I thought so. 

That went over like a lead balloon and I didn't hear from her for a few days. She then tells me she didn't expect me to agree with her. That she hadn't really been ready to hear the truth blah, blah, blah. At this point I am ready to slam my head into a brick wall full force for being honest once again. 

So then tonight I wrote a blog on Myspace stating that I am no longer giving out advice or my opinions to anyone anymore. People don't want the truth they want you to say what they want to hear and I am Oh so sorry but that just isn't me. So I will just from now on and forever keep my damn mouth shut. 

Sooooooo then friend S sends me a reply stating that she had needed to hear that she wasn't mad and please don't abandon her. Once again I am leaning towards just smacking my head a wall as hard as I can because at this point I feel it would be far less painful. 

Sometimes I think hermits have the right idea...

Health Care, The Economy, Etc...

I know I know it is a lot like beating a dead horse but sometimes it seems you have too. Health care in this country sucks unless you have money to have great insurance. If you are poor in this country and you become ill you might as well curl up in a ball and die because no one will help you. The only exceptions here is if you have kids, or are eldery and yes if they are poor they need help too. However what about tohse that do not fall into those catergories? 

Some say well get a decent job and get insurance. I dare anyone to try to find a job even flipping burgers right now. It isn't always cut and dried and it definitely isn't easy. I am in college I am trying to change my future for the better. I also have almost all the symptoms of a disease that killed my mother at age 54. The thing is it doesn't have to be deadly and as a matter of fact it can be cured if I could get medical help but I can't. 

I have no problems with helping our neighbors in the world and I believe it is a good thing to do. However damn it take care of your own first. If  our government can spend billions on health needs in foreign countries then they can afford to help their own people. I have called supposed free clinics here and once they found out I had no job and no insurance they all but laughed and a couple even hung up on me. It makes me angry that a person any person cannot get medical treatment. 

Our government even now gives away billions to companies that should have been allowed to fall flat on their faces since it was their own fault they got into such a fix. If we as citizen spend our money foolishly will the government come to us and say "Oh here you a few billion to fix you up again." no not by any means. This country runs every day on the backs of average everyday people and they are the ones that shafted. Our government has no respect for it's people and no concern for those that suffer. I have no higher hopes for this presidential term than any other in the past. It is not because of Obama or his color as that is not even a factor. What is a factor is that our president is a figurehead and he has no real power. The congress, the house, the senate now those are the ones that need replacing. 

A friend of mine once told me that the only ones that should ever be elected to office are the ones that truly do not want to be there.